Ramblings of the mind... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ramblings of an unkempt mind... 6:30 am: 147.4. I'm such a useless disgusting piece of shit. I need to stop the yo-yo but it never seems to stick. I have had long bouts even but I always fuck it up. Anyway, yesterday was good, on plan. Nothing more to add to last night as we just went to bed so ended the day at 1285 cals, 99.5g protein, and 9.6g carbs. I can't seem to figure out what my protein should be at. According to some calculators, including Cronometer, based on my stats it recommends like 49g protein daily. Some say 1g protein for ever lean kg of body weight but others say 1g for every POUND of body weight which is significantly different. I'm not trying to gain weight so I don't want excess, but I know that starving too low has its own complications. So when I'm on track I usually eat 35-65g. And I don't think my hair is falling out any more than it ever has -- I think it just seems like more because it's longer now. Regardless, it's not as thick as when I was younger for sure. It doesn't seem *too* thin, it's just thinner from what it used to be for me. But I'm also almost 40, so like while it could be from my fucked up eating patterns it could also be from age right? SIGH. I guess I will stick with higher protein for a few more days at least (will take months to see any progress but we'll see if I can maintain actually consuming this much of it). See if I can get into ketosis. See if it seems to help. The alarm went off at 6am and then we tried to sleep in a bit more but my boy is relentless in the morning once he's decided we're up -- that means we must feed him NOW. lol. He scratches and meows at the door relentlessly. So I got up to let husband sleep more. I didn't feed them right away, it was a bit TOO early, and I can't reward him for that behaviour. I made coffee and did the few dishes we left in the sink last night and talked to our plants. When coffee was ready I fed them. Little monsters. I'm glad I got up because I did miss writing in here in the mornings. That was a nice little routine and it was keeping me on track so I guess I know what that means. A few of my nails broke last week so I cut them all off and it's a lot easier and nicer to type like this. The keys slide better under the finger pads and I don't have to type at a weird angle. I do prefer how longer nails look on my hands though and if they grow back I will keep them as long as I can. Need to start thinking about the holidays and buying gifts, etc. Have more baking to do which will be a decently big task but husband and I are well-practiced cookie making machines now so I think it'll go okay. I think that's enough of a brain dump. Going to enjoy coffee now. 6:30 a.m. - December 05, 2023 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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